"Has its good side.
It’s takes a bit to get used to it. We need to be able to be discreet and avoid looking at the same person has it would be for her an obligation to look at us.
But cabecear avoids the ‘no’. No one likes receiving a no after offering an invitation. No one likes giving it either.
Being in a place such as a milonga in which we are searching for feelings, willing to discover sensations, cabecear has its charm.
If I happen to want to dance with someone and she happens to want do dance with me for sure in one moment or another our eyes will meet. We just have to be aware without staring and when she looks at us look back. Look not stare :) Probably if she really wants to dance with me she will do it several times during the evening.
If somebody does not want to dance with me she will not look at me and if she does look at me she will look away as fast as she realizes that she did.
Cabeceo avoids the uncomfortable situation of getting all the way to a table and being rejected, On the same time it avoids having to dance with someone with whom I don’t want to dance with and by not wanting to reject him making him feel bad I will probably have a bad time dancing with someone I didn't want to dance with.
Knowing in advanced that everything will be worked out during the evening through eye contact creates a certain tension in the salon right in the moment that we come in to it. And one works on his dances the whole night. The moment of the dance comes loaded, after looking for each other the whole night, by a great desire, which is not based on wanting to dance my self but cause I’m going to dance with her. And that experience makes out of tango an experience which would be totally different if we would invite and be invited in a different way."
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